Once October starts, I get into the end of the year holiday spirit. October has Halloween, which I do treat like a legit holiday because I’m Catholic. Those three days are really important to me. Especially because during my Saturn return, a lot of people that are important to me passed away. If you didn’t know, November 1st is All Saints Day. Catholics celebrate everyone that has died and is now in Heaven with God. I like to do special things based on my family’s favorite saints. We usually have a French inspired breakfast to celebrate Joan of Arc. I deep clean something I’ve been avoiding to honor Saint Zita. While cleaning I tend to put on worship music, for Thea Bowman*. TBH, it’s not ONLY for her. But to honor my blackness and the Catholic Black people that came before me. Even though Catholics have a very different relationship to religious music than most Christians. Especially Baptists like my Great Grandparents. While I grew up a Salvationist, I’ve noticed the music played there is becoming more modern as well. I don’t think Catholics need to incorporate all the extra-ness contemporary Christian radio has inside of actual mass. Personally, I don’t like the idea of turning church into a concert event. I think it cheapens the experience. There are people who we under the impression that they were experiencing some kind of religious event. When it turned out they experience frission. Which can literally happen with any song that resonates with you, if your brain works that way. Traditional hymms and spirituals bring a “the human spirit can overcome all kinds of persecution” vibe that I really love. Singing the same songs that people have sang for 100s of years embodies the very essence of one holy, apostolic church.

I also read or watch something biographical about a saint I have not studied before. I do something special to my hair because Mary Magdalene is the patron saint of hairdressers. we buy something special for Mr. T, our cat to honor Saint Francis. Even though I wear my Saint Benedict medal as an anklet every day, I make an extra effort to Ora et Labora. As a girly pop with the nightmare combo of OCD, PCOS, and Autism, it’s literally hard to get stuff done. I also struggle with sitting still and praying. I have a hard time praying while working because I can really only focus on doing one thing at a time. And, if I don’t do it right, I’ll have to do it multiple times until it feels right. Or worse, I’ll never do it again without feeling intense internal shame. You can even see it on this blog. I’ll go through long stretches of not updating because I made one (1) post that wasn’t a banger. Insane behavior I know.

A lot of people ask me who my patron saint is. I actually don’t have one. They never asked, and I can’t pick one person. However, I am really into Thea Bowman. She’s not a Saint, but a Servant of God. I do think she is going to be the patron saint of African American music or just African American Catholics. But I think it would be SO cool if she became the patron saint of influencers. You know the term “black is beautiful”? While proudly saying this on TV, she influenced the host of 60 minutes (Mike Wallace) to proclaim it as well! IKTR!!!!!!!!!!!!

I do think that Carlo Acutis is going to be the Patron Saint of Influencers. That’s a great pick as well! It’s literally so cool that we’re getting modern saints! Carlo is special to my family. One of my son’s loves to code and make cute little things on the internet. My other son loves Spiderman like Carlo did. My husband is learning Italian. While I am terrible at my “career”, I am an Influencer. I do want to try harder at this, but sometimes I feel like it’s a little vain. Vanity is a gateway to becoming cringe lol.

I’m sure you know what Halloween is. I know you know what people do on Halloween. But, one of the biggest culture shocks I have ever experienced is Beggars Night. In my part of the midwest, they don’t trick or treat on Halloween! Instead, people go from house to house and tell jokes. This happens on October 30th. Personally, I think it’s stupid and annoying. Most kids are NOT funny. They moved this from actual Halloween over safety concerns. Which is also stupid and annoying. But I didn’t grow up here, so it’s whatever. My sons’ best friend is Mexican. His parents don’t like the idea of Beggars night either and prefer Trick or Treating. So we always exchange “Boo Boxes” on actual Halloween. So our kids can Trick or Treat at at least one house.

On actual Halloween, I have a popcorn movie night with my family. We all pick one movie, so no one argues. Usually, I pick a kid friendly movie. I think this year I’m going with E.T. Which is actually one of my favorite movies of all time. Archer usually picks one of the Brendan Frasier Mummy movies. I think this year he will pick Five Nights at Freddy’s. Ken tends to be all over the place with his choices. Tre always picks the original Halloween movie. And then I watch something just for me when my kids go to sleep.

November first is All Souls Day. It’s kind of a vibey day where we contemplate death and pray for the souls that are in purgatory. I also think about people in my life that have passed away. I bake my dad’s favorite cookies. You can find the recipe here. I watch the original Star Wars and remember how badly my grandfather wanted me to name Archer Lando. This year I made an appointment to get a picture of my childhood nickname tattooed. My great grandmother gave it me and it’s very similar to my grandma’s nickname. Obviously, my grandma is still alive. But, it’s not really about her. I’ve had trouble looking death in the face, I’ve been afraid of death. A cool thing about being catholic is that the uncertainty of death, and post death are not really a thing. Like, I’m so obviously going to be in purgatory for a period of time. And, I hope that when I’m not here anymore y’all pray for me too.